Loneliness can harm your health and shorten your life

You probably already know that loneliness and social isolation are harmful emotionally, but do you know that studies show loneliness can harm your health and shorten your life. One study likens their effects to having a 15 cigarette a day smoking habit.

This can be prevented

You don’t want that for you and you don’t want that for your loved ones.  The good news is you can prevent it. This is why I am going to review your most effective ways of eliminating the harm loneliness causes along with the studies that uncovered that risk .  A core recommendation is that you should consider joining with people with whom you have shared core values and shared life experiences.

At the end of this post you will find links to the studies and tools to prevent this disease of loneliness from harming you and your loved ones.

Social Distancing is different

Social distancing is very different and at this point necessary for protecting your life and health  Hopefully you are taking the steps to protect yourself and loved ones and you are all well. Speaking of that, I want to give a shout out of thanks to those health care workers and other first responders on the front lines of the war against Covid 19, including all those at Masonicare who are doing such a great job serving the elderly of Connecticut and my granddaughter who is a nursing student serving as an EMT in the Boston area.

Bowling alone

You may known for a long time that Social Isolation is bad for your mental well being and even our society. [Over 20 years ago the book “Bowling Alone” sounded the alarm in that regard.]

That is one of the reasons I joined this great fraternity.  For more than 300 years Freemasonry has been helping its members become better persons, while forming deep and lasting friendships and improving the lives of others and it has done that for me.

It is only recently I became aware of how loneliness can harm your health and even longevity.  Fortunately, you don’t have to become a victim.  Let’s examine how you can avoid it.

AARP Article called the Loneliness Epidemic

The December 2019/January 2020 AARP Magazine has a six page cover article called The Loneliness Epidemic –New Science, New Hope.

We will start with the New Science and then examine that all important New Hope. Incidentally 6 pages is a lot of space for an article and shows how important the editors consider this problem to be.

The studies and their findings

The Article starts with a surprising finding by a professor of medicine, psychology and bio-behavioral sciences at UCLA.  Dr. Cole discovered that the blood cells of very lonely people were reacting the same way they would to a bacterial infection.  Being “sick” with loneliness is not a metaphor, it is real.

It goes on to cite the conclusion of a study by Drs. Hawkley and Cacioppo of the University of Chicago that there is a human need to be connected and integrated into a social network.  That study found “Chronic perceived isolation (i.e., loneliness) is characterized by impairments in attention, cognition, affect, and behavior …”

The article states that studies show loneliness makes us vulnerable to Alzheimer’s, suicide, high blood pressure among other things and it is more dangerous than obesity and is the equivalent of smoking 15 cigarettes a day.

The AARP article notes the Holt-Lundstad study of some 70 studies of loneliness.  That study concluded that socially isolated people had a 29% probability of early death, those living alone had a 32% increased risk and those who said they were very lonely had a 26 percent increased risk.

You need to be with people with whom you share core values and shared life experience according to that Hawkley study. Simply being around other people is not enough.

Shared core values and life experiences

How do you find people that share your core values and life experiences?

First, take an inventory of the things you have a passion for:
You may have a passion for flowers, gardening, travel, or fellowship with friends.  It could be causes such as animal welfare, homelessness or one of many charities.  Maybe you love a hobby such as woodworking, photography, watching old movies, learning new skills, observing wildlife, playing cards, collecting coins etc

Second, look for others who share those same passions.
You can check out local garden clubs, museums, libraries, senior centers and the internet. These can all be used to locate others that share your passions, depending on what they are.

The Harvard study on Happiness

The Harvard Study of Adult Development focused on happiness.  It has been ongoing for over 80 years and followed 724 men, starting when they were teenagers.  The study found a definite link between happiness and health and between having close associations with other people and happiness.

There is a great TED talk on that study and a book by the original Executive Director entitled “Triumphs of Experience”.

Hobbies and activities

One of the suggestions the Harvard study makes is for you to recall things that gave you pleasure when you were younger and re-engage.  Maybe you used to play bridge, or collect stamps or coins, were in a book club etc.  You can find groups through the internet that share almost any interest or hobby. Local senior centers offer almost every card game from bridge to whist to canasta and cribbage.  Hopefully, they will be open for business soon.  You will find them a good source for activities with others, such as bus trips to shows and attractions.  This may not apply to you, but think about your parents or older family members.  They may need your encouragement to reengage.

Volunteering-helping others

One of the most universally recommended activities is to get involved in helping others.  The website Volunteer Match is one way to get involved in doing that. There was a study in the UK that volunteering had a positive impact on health. For some reason this was particularly true for those under 40 and over 70.  Therefore, you might consider doing this jointly with a parent.

Live eyes, live hearts, live heads

Pete Seeger, in an interview with Harry Chapin, put the positive benefits of volunteering very well when he discussed his commitment to the many causes he supported over the years.  Harry asked him if he ever got frustrated and tired of being involved in so many such causes.  Pete’s answer was:
“Being committed to good causes puts you in touch with the people with the live eyes, live hearts, live heads.  It is its own reward”.

Therefore, if one of the passions you have identified is for a charitable cause, you should consider becoming a volunteer. Working with others to benefit a cause has a double benefit for you. Not only does it bring you into contact with those with whom you share a common value, it provides you with the satisfaction that come from helping others. It is little wonder it has a positive impact on happiness and preventing the harm that loneliness can cause.

The role of Fraternal, civic and religious organizations

Freemasonry’s role in preventing loneliness and social isolation

That brings me back to Freemasonry.  I can’t think of a better way of describing why my Masonic experience has been so uplifting and rewarding.

We have, the cure for loneliness and have had it for over 300 years.  Being with my Masonic Brothers has brought me into contact with individuals who share my core values.  Individuals with those “live eyes, live hearts and live heads”.

Our Ancient Charges date back at least to the early 1700s relatively unchanged and their concluding paragraph admonishes Freemasons to observe any charge that cultivates “Brotherly Love, the Foundation and Capstone, the Cement and Glory of this Ancient Fraternity”.  You can’t place more importance on the core value of brotherly love than that.

One of the Principles of the Grand Lodge, A.F.& A.M. of Connecticut, in defining its purpose states:  “It is benevolent in that it teaches and exemplifies altruism as a duty.”

It has a committee focused exclusively on Community Action activities by our Brothers.  It has Almoners to attend to the Brothers’ well being.  Masonic Lodges support numerous charities and the Appendant Bodies support even more.  Sharing these experiences with each other provides an important bond for the Brothers. It certainly has done that for me.

A word to my Masonic Brothers

Now at this time, more than ever, Masons have to ensure that we and especially our Brothers of Riper Years and Larger Lessons are feeling that love and inclusion.  We do not want their social distancing to become social isolation. We certainly do not want loneliness to harm their health.

Reach out to our Brothers. Get involved in working with them, sharing our core values and making our lives richer, by doing something (no matter how small it may seem to be) to improve the lives of those around us,  The current restrictions will eventually be lifted, but even now there is much that can be done.

Other fraternal, civic and religious organizations all have a role

You will find a similar commitment in any number of great Fraternal organizations, including the Knights of Columbus, Odd Fellows, Elks or Moose.  Maybe veterans organizations such as the American Legion or VFW and civic organizations such as the Lions are more to your liking.  And, of course, your church or synagogue is always eager for volunteers for their many activities . 

The point is that you can break the hold that loneliness and isolation can exert and prevent loneliness from harming your health and longevity.  Whether that is for you or for a parent or other loved one

Links to the studies and the TED talk

I promised I would give you an easy way to do a deeper dive in protecting yourself and your loved ones from the “disease of Loneliness”.  Set out below, you will find links to the studies mentioned and to that TED Talk as well as other  materials on the topic of Social Isolation  

The Harvard Study of Adult Development is discussed in a Harvard Gazette article.
It is also discussed in a TED talk by Dr. Waldinger at https://youtu.be/8KkKuTCFvzI (Please note that it may open on an ad which you can skip in a few seconds).

Dr.Holt-Lundstad study can be found at Holt-Lundstad

The Hawkley-Cacioppo study can be found at Loneliness Matters

Dr. Cole’s study is reported on at Cole Study

My next two blogs will address your questions as to how Freemasonry started, when, by whom and why.  Watch for the next one in two weeks.

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